Then I Became A High Voltage Dad I used to have a regular life. ( Actually,  many  of my friends say that sentence should say,"  I use to have a life", period.)  It doesn't really seem that long ago.  Then I became a Softball Dad. My lawn used to be like a carpet. It was green, mowed, trimmed, fertilized, and watered. Any weeds that dared to show their leaves were pulled out by their roots. Now I have two big bare spots  forty feet  apart. I like the bare spots. I like them because they are the only places that the weeds and crab grass aren't threatening to take over. My car used to draw admiring looks  and comments. It was  clean and waxed and shined and Armor All'd.  Now it only draws attention when it wins the "dirtiest car in the parking lot" prize. My friends and I used to spend Monday mornings talking about five-iron shots, three-putts, and titanium shafts. Now I bore them  to death with detailed play-by-play descriptions of five or six low-scoring  ball games. Somehow, they just don't understand the drama of a 2-0 game. I used to think anything over $40 was an exorbitant price for a ball bat. Now the contents of my daughter's  equipment bag are worth more than everything else in the car together -including clothes, jewelry, watches, and laptop computer. I used to have a great wife. Still do, Thank God. But that's a tribute to her patience and good humor. We used to sit and talk for hours.  We still do-to keep the driver awake when we're headed home in the wee  hours of Monday morning. We used to wonder what the kids would do when they grew up. Now she wants to know what I'm going to do IF I ever grow up. My summer casual wardrobe used to be made up of color-coordinated  polo shirts, cool cottons in bright colors, and the occasional "aloha"  shirt. Now I have a closet full of T-shirts in royal blue. Those that don't have HIGH VOLTAGE SOFTBALL on the front have  a cute saying on the back, like  "If You Follow Me Long Enough,  You'll End Up at a Ball Field." I used to glue myself to the sofa  and watch the NCAA basketball tournament and the Masters from  opening ceremony through network sign off. Now, I catch the highlights on Sportscenter. I used to be one of the tops in my field. I still am. (You have to keep a good paycheck coming in if you want to  support a Travel ball habit!) I used to have sympathy for umpires. I used to think boys were tough. I used to think a double-header was a long day at the ball field. Now we're just getting warmed up. We used to spend our summer vacation relaxing on the beach or visiting family. Now we hit the road with 40 of our closest friends. I used to think the ideal woman had brains and beauty. She still does, but  now she better also be quick, courageous, and able to bunt a good rise ball. I used to look for little restaurants that served seafood fresh off the boat. Now I'm a connoisseur of  nachos and smoked sausages. I used to be concerned that I would fall into the trap of living my life through my daughter. Now I know that I'm privileged to live my life WITH my daughter. Author: Larry Warrenfeltz (High Voltage Dad)

TheTypical Softball Player     THE TYPICAL GIRLS FAST PITCH SOFTBALL PLAYER (TGFPSP) is first and foremost somebody's little girl. At one time, she looked cute as a button, dressed in pink  with pony-tails. (Visions of Alice in Wonderland.) She played with dolls, helped mom bake cookies, and has probably earned a few bucks baby-sitting. She has been, and always will be daddy and mom’s little girl. The TGFPSP still has all those little girl attributes. The only difference is now she looks cute dressed in sliders and shorts. If she is wearing ribbons in her hair, they are team colors. She still bakes cookies ... team bake sale. And she has probably earned a few bucks ... at the team car wash. Now she is, and always will be her parent’s little pitcher, catcher, infielder, or outfielder. The TGFPSP takes pride in how much dirt she can collect every weekend. Go to dinner on a night that she is not playing and it takes an hour of primping to get ready, and she still feels self-conscious. Go after a game and she'll walk right into a restaurant with a streak of dirt across her forehead, ratted hair, stained shirt and brownish/white socks. Or brown toes with sandals! Let's EAT! The TGFPSP is ready and willing to play at the drop of a hat! If she can get away with it, she will play on two teams. (In the same day no less) She has a huge wardrobe: plenty of tournament shirts and shorts from all the teams she has played on. Her parents do her school shopping every weekend at the tournament T-shirt booth. When you say, "wear something nice", she thinks it means a tournament shirt without dirt stains. The TGFPSP needs to get an athletic scholarship. Her parents have spent $100,000 on camps, private instruction, batting cages, gloves, bats, equipment, uniforms, player fees, concession stands, travel and lodging. THEY'RE BROKE!!! The TGFPSP is a fierce competitor, willing to stand in against a fast pitcher at close distance that even pro baseball players would have trouble hitting! And she might be 5'2" and 100 lbs. soaking wet. She might play first or third base at 20 feet from home plate, saying I dare you to bunt ... drive one down my throat!!! The TGFPSP has more spirit than maybe any other team sport. At least it sounds that way. Softball is the only sport where a girls ability to cheer sometimes effects roster decisions. She can't bunt or hit, she is a liability in the field ... but she cheers constantly! The TGFPSP is playing the game for all the right reasons! SHE LOVES IT! She could hang out at the mall, stay home and watch TV, or spend her summers at the pool. Instead she has a tight schedule with limited free time, hangs out on the practice field with a coach in her face, and spends her summers getting baked on a 95 degree field with no shade. (Maybe we should get some of our kids checked for IQ? :) The TGFPSP has her priorities in order: Tournaments, League Games, Team Practices, schoolwork, individual practice and batting cage, family, private softball instruction, church, conditioning, softball camps, boys. (Maybe church comes before the batting cage.) At least on Sundays. The TGFPSP is diligent and hardworking. She knows you get out of something, what you put into it. She is not the type of kid to take the easy way out! She is competitive, not willing to give up. She learns many valuable lesson during the course of her softball career, like: you can stay at Holiday INN for $12 bucks a night if you are willing to go 4 to a room. hotels don't monitor pool usage, and you can go swimming anytime, whether your a registered guest or not. Continental breakfast means: 3 bowls of cereal, bagel, 2 donuts and 4 glasses of OJ. Unlike the geographically challenged, softball girls know how to get from home to every field in a 25 mile radius. The TGFPSP has a lot of fun every summer, enough to make her come back next year regardless of all the sacrifices, the money, the occasional bad coach, drinking water that people have put their hands in, etc, .