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Admin
 
The Dawg Pac
Don Burt
Wilson Park
2200 Crenshaw Boulevard
Torrance, California
90501
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 Team Bios |
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Team Bios
Tom Podegracz - Coach/3B. Nickname: Oachie
Besides being the beloved coach of the Dawg Pac, Tom is also our everyday third baseman. In real life, Tom is an insurance agent who represents Farmers Insurance. With the absence of very many farmers in the South Bay, Tom has a lot of free time on his hands.
A little known fact about Oachie is that he played professional ball for years! He was forced to retire one day after sliding head first into home. His wig fell off and the rest of the girls realized he was a man. It was at this point that the restraining order was issued.
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Gino Gorostieta - Pitcher. Nickname: GG
An Argentinean rumored to have German ancestry, draw your own conclusions! He is in a "dead-end" day job, working with a bunch of stiffs. Most of the people he has to ferry around have a kind of cool personality.
GG has played exclusively in the battery of the Pac! Starting out as a catcher for the world famous Tony Budrovich, Gino learned well! His solid pitching has resulted in numerous errors in the field, yet he does not hold it against his teammates. He has gotten friendly with several of the waitresses at the Dawg Pac watering hole, which could explain why a fielder's (one who had made an error that evening) beer might taste a little funky!
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Paul Stimpfl - C. Nickname: Paulie
Paulie completes the Dawg Pac’s battery. A reliable catcher, Paulie seems to have gotten over his case of "happy feet" while on the base paths. Paulie was forced behind the plate after a pin was inserted in his shoulder (depending on when you ask, it is either the right or left shoulder). Paulie got this injury while serving our country in Grenada, pulling a fellow soldier to safety while completely disregarding his own life.
That's not true, I'm not even sure why I wrote it.
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Tony Orler - 1B/OF. Nickname: 2FD (Second Fastest Dawg)
One of our first basemen and resident obnoxious lawyer for the Pac. Tony's abilities in this game are surpassed only by his ego! Unfortunately, spatial limitations keep me from posting anything that both he and his ego feel will fit a man of Tony's stature! Oh, he did hit two home runs a couple of games ago.
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Larry Percz - 1B/OF. Nickname: Larry Perez, Mr. Cindy.
Larry, whose family name comes from a former Soviet Block country (once again, draw your own conclusions), is one of our other first basemen. We let Larry play, partly because this team was co-founded by him and he has a beeyatching bat that most of us like to use! The other reason is his on-field persona. A fierce competitor and excellent first baseman, we just hope the Parks and Rec people don't find out about the Soviet doping scandal he allegedly was involved in!
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Danny Quintilliani - 2B. Nickname: "DQ"
He made us put him on the team. He threatened that he would have us all "whacked" if we didn't let him play! Lucky thing we did, as his bat has provided a lot of “pop” for us
as well as being great in the field. He also makes a killer sauce!
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Rich Heisen - SS. Nickname: Richie
Not much is know about this shadowy figure who plays a mean shortstop. There are rumors about a "play-for-pay" scandal in the Imperial Valley, but nothing can be substantiated. We think he drives the Wells Fargo stagecoach or something.
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Mike Kent - SS/2B/OF. Nickname: Mike
Insurance agent/Surfer and one of our utility infielders and outfielders. He is a jack of all trades. Mike fields any position well, and is a clutch hitter with speed around the bases. You would never know that he spent the first twenty years of his life as a woman named Ruth, confined to a wheelchair in Bucharest.
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Mark Comon – 3B/2b/OF. Nickname(s): F’ball, Marky
Mark has been recuperating a bad back over the winter months. His wife Sheryl alludes to the fact that Mark has been...shall we say...experimenting, lately. Word has it that his latest experiment, sometime around the first of the year, involved a trapeze, handcuffs, a bottle of Yoohoo and Twizzlers! Hence, the backache. When healthy, Mark sports an extra large cup (somewhere around his knee). He has a good stick and his batting isn’t bad either. In the field, what can we say...really, what can we say?
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Brad Petersen - 1B/2B/OF/Peanut Vendor. Nickname: Chumley
Perhaps the most talented player on the Pac roster (that check had better be in the mail). Brad can play left field, third base, shortstop and first. Give him a big enough laundry basket and he'll play any position!
In real life, he spends a lot of time on the couch and in the bathroom going through the Sears Catalogue. As a Direct Marketing wizard (I wouldn't make this stuff up), he is responsible for all of those annoying little postcards that come with your junk mail. He is also “keeper of the race”. The rumor is that 2FD has paid Chumley well not to release the evidence that he came in second.
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Jeff Ruben – OF. Nickname(s): Leon, Heffe, TFD (The Fastest Dawg)
Jeff won the great race. Maybe second only to Sophia in speed (would this make Tony 3FD?). Jeff is an excellent left-center fielder who enjoys buying a beer for his friends. His favorite expression? "Baaaaaaaaaack!" As a BoSox fan, he has known much heartache in his years, so I will not say anything more.
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Brad Means – OF. Nickname: Lefty
Brad is the only Dawg who can go to right with any consistency. He is also an excellent fielder who also managed to be blessed with a great voice. It does get kind of distracting to hear him doing his own play-by-play in the field…”It’s a well hit ball to center, Brad coming in under it and he MAKES the catch!”
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Pat Welsh – OF. Nickname: Pant Leg
Pat patrols the right-centerfield area with authority. Rumor has it that now that he has had some kind of nastiness removed from his shoulder, he will be trying to play catcher. He was overheard in a neighborhood watering hole saying “…if that candy-assed Paulie can keep milking that Grenada story to keep from actually having to work in the field, I should be able to be a catcher too!”
We’ll keep you posted.
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Don Burt - OF/C. Nickname(s): Don Cheech, Donnie Softball
Don, our resident webmaster and part-time online poet, roams around in RF watching the moonrise from behind the trees, hoping it isn't a softball being hit over his head. A die-hard Yankee fan, Don is rumored to have shaved points in a softball championship on the east coast one year for playoff tickets, and, before the next baseball season started, Don was given a choice to relocate to the West Coast under the Federal Witness Protection Program. Under the terms of the relocation, he would have had to change his name to Carl and become an Angels’ fan. Saying he’d rather die, he moved to the West Coast anyway.
It is rumored that Don bleeds Yankee Blue, but anyone who knows him realizes that Jack Daniels had long ago bleached ANY color from his blood!
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The Dawg Pac Bench:
Brian Anderson - Wherever. Nickname: Anderson
Brian get's called up to the Show whenever we are short a man. Brian prefers to do his talking with the bat, going 1.000 for a stretch! An excellent poker player, Brian will spout the odds of Chumley making it to first after the ball is hit and before Chumley actually gets to the base. Wait, that's no big deal, he has a lot of time to figure it out. Nevermind.
Rick Rodono - P/1B/3B/OF. Nickname: The Raspberry
Rick seldom sees a lot of playing time. The Pac reserves him almost exclusively for tournament play. This is where he shines. In one tourney, it is rumored that he played in 82 games and hit for the cycle 63 times! He then went home and cooked Pasta e Fagioli for the family and still had time to play bocce with his son Dominick!
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Dawg Pac Hall of the Mediocre:
Tony Budrovich - Lifetime Ban. Nickname: Tony B
Tony was the first pitcher taken by the Pac in the expansion draft. Although a little older than the rest, Oach took a chance on him anyway. Tony's legend was that he could make a softball dance like Fred Astaire! Rarely in life does the legend pale in comparison to the real thing. Tony's pitch was a marvel to watch as it rode the wispy currents of air to the plate, first this way, then that way, sometimes making it almost all the way to third base before being brought back over the plate. Gino lost 27 pounds chasing those pitches, but alas, it was not meant to be. A sharp umpire saw Tony smear the ball with some stolen sacred Chrism, and ejected him from the game he loved so well! Tony was subsequently banned from all league play by the ASA, though he could be reinstated at any time.
Tim Hunt - OF? It's been so long I don't remember. Nickname: Doc
Doc Hunt was our team physician as well as a fielder. Word around town has it that after making a close play, he was worried about messing up his manicure...I mean, ruining his surgical touch. I think he got sick of us asking for painkillers. We miss you Doc.
Brett Keshtkar – OF/C. Nickname(s): Any one of a hundred variations of his last name.
Brett has been missing in action during the winter season. We believe he is honing his skills, in the Dominican Republic, for catching balls off of his face and losing his hat.
Take Me Out to the Ballgame
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